Destruction is necessary for construction. For us to step forward, we have to leave some things behind. For us to build something new, we have to take apart something old. For us to create, we need to destroy, even if what we destroy is only the silence and the emptiness.
Destruction isn’t bad, it’s a valuable part of the process of growth.
The key to understanding this, and to appreciating the value of destruction, is to acknowledge your love of the past, and your need to try something different in the future as an important part of your growth.
This process of turning the negatives, that sometimes come with destruction, into positives works both within your own self, and with others in your life.
So whenever you come upon resistance to change, you can very likely turn the resistance into support by clarifying the reasons why you very much love and honor the many good things that have happened already because they allowed you to become more of the kind of person you wanted to become. Then, once that appreciation has fully set in and has neutralized the resistance, you can explain, as clearly as possible, what kind of person you want to now grow into, and say why you believe that your newly changing path will help you get there. And finally, you can open yourself up to modifying your path slightly so that the force that was previously your resistance has a chance to actually help push you towards your new direction, if that opportunity presents itself.
Because sometimes, on the rare occasion, when you trust others who have supported you in the past, even when you choose to head in a new direction, they can surprise you and want to come with you, or have, perhaps, even been there already and can give you many of the resources you need to get yourself wherever it is you want to go…
In a general sense, this reversal process is one of compassionately stepping from -1, to 0, to +1, or maybe even +2.
- The resistance starts at -1
- Adding love of the past brings it to a neutral 0
- Adding your desire for future growth gets it to a positive 1
- And opening yourself up to any support being offered can get you there with more than enough!
Just remember to be specific. I’ve given you the general formula for the numbers, now you can put in your own particular terms to make it work for your own unique situation. And remember, an “I’m sorry.” always works wonders for reversing resistance, as does phrasing things to clarify what you want, rather than trying to speak for others. Give others the freedom to follow you, or to go wherever they want to go, and they will respond in kind. :-)